moulding and shaping....

Continuing on from that really moody blog from ages ago....

'Only in a world where faith is difficult, can faith exist.'

Been thinking about that above quote for a bit. Maybe I'm starting to realise what it really means.

I've been taught since I was young to always trust in God, to look to Him in times of turmoil and need. Growing up at Waverley, those truths were so easy to accept. ‘Yeah yeah, when half my immediate family gets wiped out in a freak safari accident in Africa involving a hippopotamus, I’ll just trust in God, and everything will be fine.’ But when those tough times rolled around....I found myself in a absolute mess. It's always a bit harder than what you envisaged. It's all good to learn scripture, to pray everyday, to think of Him once in a while, but your true character.....true faith....the true nature of your heart....is revealed through those times of chaos and confusion, when you’re hurting like nothing else and you feel like you have nowhere to turn to. That's just my spin on it =]P

This whole year....I've learnt more about myself than I ever have before, and grown so much. And in a funny way...I'm so glad it happened; the hurt and tears not so much...but some lessons need to be learnt the hard way. There was one moment, where I KNOW God reached down into my situation. And I will remember that moment forever. Some people might blow it off...and admittedly I did aswell....but once I saw it in the context of my situation....I realised its significance. Epiphany's have abounded since. haha

I think the personal nature of a faith in Jesus Christ has also been highlighted to me. So many gods that other religions worship are all impersonal, so seemingly detached from our lives; our hurt and pain. When Jesus came…He suffered so much. All of our pain rolled into one massive furball that He had to swallow. Rejection by His own people, temptation by the devil, being arrested for His truth and righteousness. He’s experienced our suffering...but to such a greater extent than we could ever imagine. Every tear I shed, He sheds. Every time my heart breaks, His breaks aswell. It’s such a great comfort =] How could you not love someone who practised more than He preached, who entered our world and suffered our pains, and comforts us in our sorrows when He could more than happily have walked away and said “You got yourselves into this mess, now get yourselves out’?? What more could He do??

I've come to realise there is so much wrong with my life. (Wow...that came out really easily, considering you're probably a random that doesn't even know me..or maybe you do know me, and you're opinion of me just dropped a lot haha) Lyrics from a Hillsong song- 'I'm delivered, but it doesn't seem right, unless I keep my eyes focused, on the Saviour who gave His life.' I'll be the first to admit, that sometimes I've purely viewed God as a get out of jail ticket. And that's so wrong. He deserves so much more.

andy.